“That's right.Forteen-year old boys have better taste than you.They think I'm hot." I licked my fingertip and stuck it on my butt. "Tsssss."And with that,I propelled myself across the slope and skidded to a stop at one end of the trick rail. "Quick," I told the boys, "act like you think I'm hot."Chloe cracked up.josh stared blankly at me.His friends blushed deep red,but they weren't claiming it."Thanks for your support," I told them. "Look without looking like your looking.Is Nick gone?”

“I'd like to think they're staring at me because of my white-hot animal magnetism, but I'm not Elvis. I'm Lobster Boy, hear me roar.”

“You're sure you don't need me to walk you home?" I say, lifting my eyebrow and giving her my most flirtatious smile.She refuses but blushes deeply-hot pink spreading across her cheeks. As usual, I feel a wild rush of success. I love flirting more than food. Or even fighting. And evoking a blush is one of the most satisfying results I can hope for.I like this girl, I find myself thinking. I'm actually looking forward to her being around.”

“Your monkey was looking under the stall doors in the ladies' room,' I told Diesel.'That's my boy,' Diesel said.”

“I told you, I want more than this. I want to be with you. I want to be your lover." I swore, digging my hands into my hair. "I'm falling for you, Chloe.”

“Mmm, butt bagels." Elody reaches into the bag and pulls out a bagel, half squashed, then makes a big deal of taking an enormous bite out of it. "Taste like Victoria's Secret.""Taste like thong floss," I say."Taste like crack," Lindsay says."Taste like fart," Elody says, and Lindsay spits coffee on the dashboard, and I start laughing and can't stop, and all the way to school we're thinking of flavors for butt bagels, and I'm thinking that this---my life, my friends---might be weird or screwy or imperfect or damaged or whatever, but it's never seemed better to me.”