“My last conscious thought was of my biggest mistake- not the boy beside me, but the one i could never have.”

“When a boy… discovers that he is more given into introspection and consciousness of self than other boys his age, he easily falls into the error of believing it is because he is more mature than they. This was certainly a mistake in my case. Rather, it was because the other boys had no such need of understanding themselves as I had: they could be their natural selves, whereas I was to play a part, a fact that would require considerable understanding and study. So it was not my maturity but my sense of uneasiness, my uncertainty that was forcing me to gain control over my consciousness. Because such consciousness was simply a steppingstone to aberration and my present thinking was nothing but uncertain and haphazard guesswork.”

“I never thought this day would come for me. I never thought I’d find someone whom I loved with every fiber of my being and I never thought that I would find someone that taught me that I was worth being loved. I’m beyond happy, no, I’m honored to have you sitting beside me Sloane. My partner, my friend, my life, my love, my wife, my everything. Thank you for teaching me about love,” he said. Siva”

“This was many years ago. The staircase wall on which I saw the rising glimmer of his candle has long since ceased to exist. In me, too, many things have been destroyed that I thought were bound to last forever and new ones have formed that have given birth to new sorrows and joys which I could not have foreseen then, just as the old ones have been difficult for me to understand. It was a very long time ago, too, that my father ceased to be able to say to Mama, “Go with the boy.” The possibility of such hours will never be reborn for me.”

“Thinking there is something better out there in the world, something worth more than you already have- of all my mistakes,that was my biggest.”

“It's just the biggest mistake I could think to make”