“Do not blame my tone of voice, my lack of patience, or my bad mood on PMS. It's not my period that's my problem.”

“He was Pinocchio to my Gepetto.”

“My parents were consistently inconsistent.”

“maybe it's not about having a plan, or even a plan B. Maybe it's about seeing where life takes you and learning to enjoy the ride.”

“I guess relationships are just funny like that. It's impossible to figure out why some work out and others don't. Why someone can be so imperfect and still be the perfect person for you. Maybe, in the end, it's not about changing the person you care about. Maybe it's about learning what you can live with. Or maybe it's really about learning what you can't live without.”

“As ugly as the truth is, it's even uglier when someone says out loud what you've been thinking to yourself.”

“Your penis will not shrivel up and die if you admit you want an umbrella instead of standing in the rain acting like a little water never hurt anyone. It's an unbrella, not a purse.”