“I've had great success being a total idiot. ”

“I shall pass through this world but once, any good therefore that I can do or any kindness that I can show to any human being, let me do it now, let me not defer or neglect it for I shall not pass this way again”

“I get paid for what most kids get punished for.”

“Pity? [If] you don't want to be pitied because you're a cripple in a wheelchair, stay in your house!”

“Every man's dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands”

“Faithfulness in small things leads to faithfulness in great things, and never the other way around.”

“If the Lord made anything better than a woman he kept it for himself.”