“Then, out of the blue, Aaron Winer saved the day. He took her to some movie and made out with her in the back row. The next day, at school, they were boyfriend and girlfriend. Bam! Problem solved. I pretended to be bitter about this, but in fact I was so relieved that I started laughing hysterically in history class and had to be excused to go the nurse.”

“Look, I was an idiot. I didn't want people to think that I had a crush, so I decided to give everyone the impression that I truly, honestly hated Madison Harter. For no reason. Just thinking about this makes me want to punch myself in the eyeball.”

“Are you done eating that?" "What?""You shouldn't finish that, Dad's gonna want some.""The hell he will.""He will.""It's so nasty. Son, it's so nasty.""Then why are you finishing it?""Taking a bullet.”

“And the point of Rachel the Film should really have been to express how awful and shitty that loss was, that she would have become a person with a long awesome life if she had been allowed to continue living, and that this was just a stupid meaningless loss, a motherfucking loss, a loss loss loss fucking loss, there was no fucking meaning to it, there was nothing that could come out of it...”

“If after reading this book you come to my home and brutally murder me, I do not blame you.”

“i met this girl down the block from me. used to tell myself she was to hot for me,but then i saw her at the corner store,so i ran on over just to grab the door,i got her number we started chillen [ hay] we started buzzen we got addicted,now i,i'm the one she can't live with out... i bet that her right now, shorty hiten me up,says she wants a re-up,knows i got the best in town cause when she gets the shivers,she knows i'll deliver, i'm the one who holds her down,she's about to break +4,nd know i won't let her wait +4,its geten kinda late,late,late, late,and she just wanna shake, shake,shake,shake..”

“-Lara is a weasel. I've always hated her. The only happy week I had as a child was when she fell from the roof and went into a coma. She came out of it, though. Everyone was so happy.-Is that true? asked James.-No, said Grieve. But they would have been happy. Everyone thinks she's so clever. And I would be happy if she went away and never came back.”