“Pour your scotch on the rocksand drink your misery down.Go home and make love to herand picture me, picture me.Yeah, picture me!”

“At school my boobs were bigger than all my friends' and I was afraid to show them. Now I feel like they make my outfits look better. They're like an accessory.”

“Is this chicken, what I have, or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says 'Chicken by the Sea.”

“Platypus? I thought it was pronounced platymapus. Has it always been pronounced platypus?”

“Twenty-three is old. It's almost 25, which is like almost mid-20s.”

“I think there's a difference between ditzy and dumb. Dumb is just not knowing. Ditzy is having the courage to ask.”

“laugh a lot. It burns a lot of calories.”