“Toby smiled and started to speak, but Josh adjusted his hold on Tank and reached back, covering Toby's mouth."Wait," Grace said. "I think he was going to actually use words.""Yeah, but trust me, you don't want to hear them."Toby pulled Josh's hand away. "Are you my new mommy?"Grace's mouth fell open in shock, and Toby giggled at the sight."Okay, Tiger," Josh said. "You know I love the sound of your laugh, probably more than any sound in the world, but I will squash you like a grape if you say that to one more woman today.”
“Arf! Arf, arf, arf!"Oh, Jesus, the Antichrist's barking was going to split open his head."Quiet, Tank," Grace said. "Toby, baby, grab him and put him in the laundry room, please. Anna, good, you're back. Get a phone in case we need to call nine-one-one.""Got it," Anna said, sounding so unusually shaken that Josh did open his eyes. Look at that, Antichrist number two was worried about him. Nice change.”
“Ty pointed his beer at Josh. "Want to know what I think?""No," Josh said."I think you have a case of being a little girl. Maybe you should prescribe yourself a heavy dose of man-the-fuck-up.”
“The question is, did you get your life-changing experience?"Amy looked at Matt and smiled. "I did."Matt's entire heart turned over in his chest. "Damn," he said, pulling her in. "Damn, I love you.""Watch the arm!" Josh warned."He's not watching that arm," Ty said as Matt kissed Amy again.”
“You said you'd kiss me if I lost Tank."---"You want me to kiss you?"Oh boy. "You were happy I'd lost your puppy?"He was looking like he was still thinking about smiling as he glanced down at Tank, tucked under his arm. "No. That would make me an asshole."Right...”
“It was on the table when I got here," Matt said in his defense.Josh eyed the open magazine. "You don't already know how to satisfy your boyfriends in bed?"Matt ignored this. "Did either of you know there's ninety-nine ways to give a blow job? That's ninety-nine nights of blow jobs.""Look at you with the math skills," Josh said.Matt flipped him off while Ty flipped the page. "'How to Give Your Hoo-Ha a Spa Day.' Huh," he said. "I didn't know a woman's hoo-ha needed a spa day.”
“Josh had made a lot of mistakes in his life, and he'd tried to learn from all of them. He definitely tried to not repeat them.Hiring Grace had been his favorite mistake so far.”