“I followed him through the halls of the enormous church until we got to the staff's kitchen. He went to the fridge, opened it, and came out with a bottle of bourbon. He poured some into a coffee cup, drank it down, and poured some more. He offered me the bottle.No, thanks. Aren't you supposed to drink vodka?Aren't you supposed to wear a pointy hat and ride on a flying broomstick?Touche, I said.”

“He refused tea, but Mrs. Crowley poured out a cup and handed it to him. 'You need not drink it, but I insist on your hoding it in your hand. I hat people who habitually deny themselves things.”

“V? Answer the question or so help me God I'll beat it out of you.""I just know how to find him.""What are you hiding?"V went over to the bar, poured himself a couple of fingers of GreyGoose, and hammered the shot. He swallowed a number of times and thenlet the words fly."I fed him."A chorus of inhales floated a...round the room. As Wrath rose in disbelief, V poured himself another hit of Goose."You did what?" The last word was bellowed."I had him drink some of me.""Vishous..." Wrath stalked around the desk, shitkickers hitting thefloor like boulders. The king got face-to-face close. "He's a male. He's human. What the fuck were you thinking?"More vodka. Definitely time for more Goose.”

“You're bored, aren't you.''I need constant distraction. Shall we go?''Uh, aren't you supposed to delegate responsibility or something? If you're not here, who's in charge?'Skulduggery looked around and pointed to a sorcerer at the far side of the cemetery. 'He is.''Who is he?''Don't know. He looks like leadership material, though, doesn't he?''Does he?''He's wearing a hat.''And that means he's a leader?''Leaders wear hats. It's to keep the rain off while we make important decisions. He'll do fine.''Shouldn't you tell him that he's in charge?' 'And spoil the surprise?”

“Once upon a time an academic scientist went to visit a Zen Master, famous for being very wise. After greeting the scholar, the master offered him tea. As they sat together, the monk began to pour the tea into the scholar's cup. He poured until the tea overflowed onto the saucer, then the table and finally onto the floor.When the scholar could not stand it any more, he blurted out: "Stop, stop, can't you see the cup is full?" To which the Zen Master replied: "Yes, I can, and until your mind is empty, you will not hear what I have to say.”

“He downed the last of his coffee, carried his mug over to the pot, poured himself a refill, and returned to the table.Why, yes, thank you, I'd love some more coffee. Hmmm, Narcisstic Personality Disorder? Attention Deficit Disorder? Or just a typical male?”