“Your religious beliefs are your business. They are not and should not be the basis for law. If you use them as justification to discriminate against others, don’t be upset when others decide you’re an asshole."[Blog post of July 26, 2011]”

“1. Bullying is not okay. Period.2. Freedom of religion does not give you the right to physically or verbally assault people.3. If your sincerely-held religious beliefs require you to bully children, then your beliefs are fucked up.”

“Freedom of speech does not protect you from the consequences of saying stupid shit.[Blog post, March 12, 2012]”

“Isaac: “Besides, is it really stealing if you’re stealing from an asshole?”Lena: “I’d have to double-check, but I don’t think the criminal code includes an asshole clause.”

“Torches," Porak ordered."This is dumb," Jig grumbled as one of the others handed out torches. "Why not run ahead and warn any intruders that we're coming? Maybe we should sing, too, in case they're blind.”

“I like big books and I cannot lie.You other readers can’t denyThat when a kid walks in with The Name of the WindLike a hardbound brick of win.Story bling.Wanna swipe that thingCause you see that boy is speedingRight through the book he’s reading.I’m hooked and I can’t stop pleading.Wanna curl up with that for ages,All thousand pages.Reviewers tried to warn me.But with that plot you hookedMe like Bradley.Ooh, crack that fat spine.You know I wanna make you mine.This book is stella ’cause it ain’t some quick novella.”

“[In an interview when asked about becoming a fantasy creature] You know, it might be fun to be Sanguinarius Meyerii (better known as “sparklers”). They have all of the vampire superpowers and almost none of the weaknesses: no burning up in sunlight, no vulnerability to garlic, etc. As for my demise, I have no idea what you’re talking about. Once I get this kind of power, I’m planning to live forever. It’s the only way I’ll catch up on my reading!”