“Put on a sweater.”

“It is not fair to be old, to put on a brown sweater.”

“I'm miserable but the thing is that I want to be miserable. It's kind of nice. Like a comfortable sweater that you put on around teh house but wouldn't be caught dead wearing in public.”

“Ira felt as if he'd contracted an all-over emotional itch, as if he'd put on a sweater made of spiritually abrasive wool- but to take it off would leave him dreadfully cold.”

“Don't you remember, Travis? You ruined her sweater."Travis smiled. "I ruin a lot of sweaters.""Gross," I muttered.”

“If you were ever dumped after knitting a guy a sweater, consider the possibility that the problem was with the sweater, not you. The recipient probably took one look at the thing, imagined a lifetime of having to pretend to like (and wear) this sweater and others of its like, and saw no choice but to flee into the night”