“When you start thinking that you need more hours in a day you either have too much on your plate, you need to revise your schedule, or you're simply becoming slow...”

“And I thought -- when you're a half-hour late, and your friends think you're in jail, it's probably a sign you steal too much.”

“I'm trying not to think about it too much because that makes it worse. It's kind of like when you look at yourself in the mirror and you say your name. And it gets to a point where none of it seems real. I can do that, but I don't need an hour in front of a mirror. It happens very fast, and things start to slip away.”

“Writing all day every day is good, but it’s not good enough. You need to have your clone ghostwriting for you too.”

“I do not think I exaggerate when I say that some of us put our offering in the plate with a kind of triumphant bounce as much as to say: "There - now God will feel better!" I am obliged to tell you that God does not need anything you have. He does not need a dime of your money. It is your own spiritual welfare at stake in such matters as these. You have the right to keep what you have all to yourself - but it will rust and decay, and ultimately ruin you.”

“Pimpin' ain't easy, but it's necessary, especially if you wanna fully utilize the power of your kitchen. You can't have your spatulas and whisks runnin' around like they own the place. Having the right utensils is a good start, but then you gotta show them who's the boss up in this bitch. In this chapter, I'm gonna tell you what you need to get started, what you don't need, and how to know if you're ready to become a full-fledged KP.”