“Nurse: "You look like a pharmaceutical rep. you can leave samples in the closet."Joe: "I'm actually a lawyer."Nurse: "My condolences.”

“If I'm not a nurse, I'd like to be a nurse .”

“Uncle Joe used to spend a fair amount of time in the loony bin. My family wasn't bothered by his regular trips to and from 'the facility'--they'd shrug and say, There goes Joe, and they'd put him in the car and take him in. One day Uncle Frank...was driving Uncle Joe to the crazy place. When they got there, Joe asked Frank to drop him off at the door while Frank went and parked the car. Frank didn't think much of it, and dropped him off.Joe went inside, smiled at the nurse, and said, 'Hi. I'm Frank Hornbacher. I'm here to drop off Joe. He likes to park the car, so I let him do that. He'll be right in.' The nurses nodded knowingly. The real Frank walked in. The nurse took his arm and guided him away, murmuring the way nurses always do, while Frank hollered in protest, insisting that he was Frank, not Joe. Joe, quite pleased with himself, gave Frank a wave and left.”

“and she's a nurse. do you know how hard nursing school is? it's like medical school. so she's obviously smart.”

“I see.” The nurse nodded. “How can I help you?”“I’m Inspector Mc—” Phineas halted, obviously having second thoughts about using his real name.“Man-boob,” Brynley finished for him.He stiffened.“What can I do for you, Inspector McMan-boob?” the nurse asked.He gritted his teeth. “It’s muscle.”“Inspector Muscle?” the nurse asked.“Yes. Exactly.” He gave Brynley a triumphant look. “And this is my assistant, Nurse—”“Doctor,” Brynley corrected him.“Doctor . . .” He glanced down at her chest. “A-cup.”“B-cup!”He arched a brow. “You’ll have to prove it.”

“My shoulder will never be the same. I expect you to nurse me back to health.”