“So, does anyone know if this person really did drown in that pond? I mean, really really?" Kim shrugged. "I dunno." "Haven't you ever asked your parents?" Brianne and Kim gave her blank looks. Obviously not.”

“[on Halloween]Shaya could hear the clump-clump-clump of their mother's feet on the stairs. When she appeared in the living room doorway, neither Shaya nor Dev could speak. "Oh, gosh," Shaya finally said. "Well? What do you think?" Shaya's lips moved, but she couldn't find the words. Finally Dev uttered, "Mom, you're a… cow." "Right! So that Shaya and I could do a theme." At their blank expressions, she said. "Get it? Cowgirl… cow." Shaya finally found her voice. "Mom, you're… huge. You're huge and black and white and you have an udder.”

“Howdy, pardner," he said. "Howdy… mad scientist. I don't know any geek-speak, so that's all you're getting.”

“A note sat on the kitchen table. Shaya snatched it up and read:Shay,I'm taking Dev to the clinic, he's still sick. Didn't want to wake you, you were sleeping so soundly. Hope to be back early afternoon. Love, Mom PS – don't forget you're grounded”

“Sure, okay, I'll pick up some cat litter. Anything else?""Watch your back, G." Then she hung up.Hero paused in her sobbing to look at me quizzically. "Why does your mom want cat litter? You guys don't even have a cat.""She uses it for..." I searched my brain madly, but all I could come up with was "teaching.""She uses cat litter to teach English?"I nodded. "She's kind of unconventional in her methods."Hero frowned. "But how does she use it?"The girl was relentless when she fixated on something. "Um, when their papers are really bad, she gives them a little bag of cat litter. It's her way of telling them their writing is crap." I laughed. "She's kooky.”

“All of us have our wires crossed and crisscrossed so many times it's impossible to untangle the mess. It really does seem like the entire human race might as well be conversing with hand gestures and grunts, for all the success we're having.”

“Went home briefly to get my halter dress for Hero's party, and Mom was waiting for me at the kitchen table. Either she's psychic, or she totally reads my journal, because I haven't said a word about Ben, but somehow she knows something is up.She was siting with a tray of peanut butter crackers, milk, and about twenty pamphlets on STDs she got from her friend Connie, a nurse at Kaiser. When she started showing me pictures of genital warts, I put my cracker down and said, 'Mom, is this really necessary?' She said, 'Honey, I just want you to understand the risks.''Yeah, thanks. Now I'm so traumatized I won't have sex until I'm a senior citizen.'She smiled. 'Great. I guess I've done my job then. Do you want a sandwich.”