“I don't understand why you're so obsessed with figuring out everything that happens here, like we have to unravel every mystery.”

“I don't understand why I screw everything up.”

“One of the reasons you're so terrified about figuring out what you're gonna do with your life is that you think you're only gonna be able to do one thing.”

“All at once, I couldn’t figure out why I was methodically tossing a spherical object through a toroidal object. It seemed like the stupidest thing I could possibly be doing.”

“I don't know why boys expect us to like boy movies. We don't expect them to like girl movies.”

“I don't really understand the point of crying. Also, I feel that crying is almost- like, aside from deaths of relatives or whatever- totally avoidable if you follow two very simple rules: 1. Don't care too much. 2. Shut up. Everything unfortunate that has ever happened to me has stemmed from failure to follow one of the rules.”

“Why are breakfast food breakfast foods?" I asked them. "Like, why don't we have curry for breakfast?""Hazel, eat.""But why?" I asked. "I mean seriously: How did scrambled eggs get stuck with breakfast exclusivity? You can put bacon on a sandwich without anyone freaking out. But the moment your sandwich has an egg, boom, it's a breakfast sandwich.”