“I'm not asexual. I'm arelationshipal.”

“I'm not interested in dating a girl I'm not gonna marry”

“I'm not saying it was your fault. I'm saying it wasn't nice.”

“I'm not embarrassed by my faith, and I'm also not embarrassed by my doubt.”

“The problem exactly is that she dumped me. That I'm alone. Oh my God, I'm alone again. And not only that, but I'm a total failure in case you haven't noticed. I'm washed up. I'm former. Formerly the boyfriend of Katherine XIX. Formerly a prodigy. Formerly full of potential. Currently full of shit.”

“I'm full of shit. I'm never myself. I've got a Southern accent around the oldsters; I'm a nerd for graphs and deep thoughts around you; I'm Miss Bubbly Pretty Princess with Colin. I'm nothing. The thing about chameleoning your way through life is that it gets to where nothing is real.”

“I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things.”