“Me: "Touch the cave wall."Computer: "You touch the cave wall. It is moist."Isaac: "Lick the cave wall."Computer: "I do not understand. Repeat?"Me: "Hump the moist cave wall."Computer: "You attempt to jump. You hit your head."Isaac: "Not jump. HUMP."Computer: "I don't understand."Isaac: "Dude, I've been alone in the dark in this cave for weeks and I need some relief. HUMP THE CAVE WALL."Computer: "You attempt to ju-"Me: "Thrust pelvis against the cave wall."Computer: "I do not-"Isaac: "Make sweet love to the cave."Computer: "I do not-”

“You see, unlike most writers today, I do not use a computer. I write the old-fashioned way: on the walls of caves.”

“Tribe cats are named after the first thing their mother sees, but I thing this would lead to a lot of kits being named 'wall of cave', 'side of cave' and 'floor of cave”

“He's a Nethanderal! Behold the might of my caveman!"Mrs. Isaacs looked up at me, "I believe they're called 'Neanderthals', Hon."I looked down at my watercolor caveman, making a face as I felt like a Nethanderal, painting the wall of my cave. "Neanderthal just sounds so...Archaic.”

“A few grass mats, some cave drawings, the heads of my enemies mounted on the wall ... it could be quite pleasant.”

“I could see everything she said as if it were a wall painting inside the cave of my own skull.”