“Was it animal pee or human pee? Someone asked.How would I know? What, am I an expert in the study of pee?”

“I wanted to stop peeing but couldn't, of course. Peeing is like a good book in that it is very, very hard to stop once you start.”

“Ben, if you get pee in my brand-new car, I am going to cut your balls off."Still peeing, Ben looks over at me smirking. "You´re gonna need a hell of a big knife, bro.”

“I feel like I might start crying and that I'm going to cry pee.”

“Peeing is like a good book in that it is very, very hard to stop once you start.”

“Traveling, I am finding, teaches you a lot of things about yourself. For instance, I never thought myself to be the kind of person who pees into a mostly empty bottle of Bluefin energy drink while driving through South Carolina at seventy-seven miles per hour - but in face I am that kind of person.”

“That night, the booze felt great, as the warmth of the wine in my stomach spread through my body. I didn't like feeling stupid or out of control, but I liked the way it made everything (laughing, crying, peeing in front of your friends) easier.”