“You can say a lot of bad things about Alabama, but you can't say that Alabamans as a people are duly afraid of deep fryers.”
“There a lot of things I can't do," he says. "With my... health.""Well," I say, "can you kiss girls?”
“People would say bad things about you, because it is the only way their insignificant self can feel better than you.”
“Saying something is 'too bad' is easy. You say you disapprove, which makes you a nice person, and then you can go about your business and not be interested anymore. It's a lot worse than 'too bad.' It's against everything decent and natural.”
“The most un-American thing you can say is, 'You can't say that.”
“I can't lie and say there are no bad writers. Sorry, but there are lots of bad writers.”