“You're funny, and you're smart, and you may show up late, but you always show up eventually.”

“You know your problem, Quentin? You keep expecting people not to be themselves. I mean, I could hate you for being massively unpunctual and for never being interested in anything other than Margo Roth Spiegelman, and for, like, never asking me about how it's going with my girlfriend - but I don't give a shit, man, because you're you. My parents have a shit ton of black Santas, but that's okay. They're them. I'm too obsessed with a reference website to answer my phone sometimes when my friends call, or my girlfriend. That's okay, too. That's me. You like me anyway. And I like you. You're funny, and you're smart, and you may show up late, but you always show up eventually.”

“Keys show up when you reconcile yourself to the bus...”

“You may be smart, but I've been smart longer.”

“Because you may be smart, but I’ve been smart longer”

“Poor Pudge. Oh, poor poor Pudge. Do you want me to climb into bed with you and cuddle?""Well since you're offering--""NO! UP! NOW!”

“And in my classes, I will talk most of the time, and you will listen most of the time. Because you may be smart, but I've been smart longer.”