“.....there's a stinking huge difference between influence and the authority you get with a title. Any dolt can stumble into a title.....Lots of people with big-sounding titles have people under them listening only because they have to.”

“Leadership is not about titles, positions or flowcharts. It is about one life influencing another.”

“Every book title becomes infinitely better if 'in your pants' or 'from your pants' is added to the title.”

“You can't sell people a new idea backed only by your authority. You have to have respect for the lives the people have led to this point and begin with them there; their experiences have led them to their assumptions and conceptions. As you identify and legitimate those experiences, you can help people identify their own primary needs in society. Then they can begin to imagine other people as having parallel needs.”

“Because introverts are typically good listeners and, at least, have the appearance of calmness, we are attractive to emotionally needy people. Introverts, gratified that other people are initiating with them, can easily get caught in these exhausting and unsatisfying relationships.”

“The most noble title any child can have, Demosthenes wrote, is third.”

“restaurant of her choice, she taught me the lesson of “proximity.” “You don’t have to throw people away,” she said. “You just have to decide how close you want them. Not every person in your life needs to be your best friend: some can be friends or just friendly acquaintances.”