“Donkeys...I've decided that donkeys are universally cute. Really cute. So cute that donkeys defy any arguments of preferences being relative. When you pet their noses, they blink their eyes and bashfully look away as if embarrassed. And when donkeys hee-haw, they have their mouths and lips curled up as if they are smiling. Boyfriend and girlfriend donkeys rest their heads on each other's rumpt and fan each other's faces with their tails. And kid donkeys, the size of an average dog, trot around with big smiles on their faces and floppy, dangly, long donkey ears. Too cute.”

“Then Samson said. With a donkeys jawbone I have made donkeys of them. With a donkey's jawbone I have killed a thousand of them.”

“Donkeys live a long time. None of you has ever seen a dead donkey.”

“The donkey nibbled on his butt. "What the hell!" Leaping a foot, Ozzie jerked around. The donkey was right THERE, not two inches from him, his ears laid back and his big brown eyes soulful. How had the damned thing moved so silently? "He's just being friendly." Marci shared that special smile that felt like a caress. "He likes you." Appalled, Ozzie said, "He likes my ass." And he backed out of the donkey's reach. "I do, too." No, no, no. He wasn't about to touch that one. "It'd help if you'd just be quiet, Marci." Unaffected by his dark mood, she laughed. "Lighten up, Osbourne. It's not my fault, or the donkey's that you have such an irresistible bod."-Osbourne and Marcie”

“Janet! Donkeys!”

“Crabs, crabs, crabs. Crabs the size of beach donkeys.”