“I didn't know zombies could eat demons," admitted Paul."Oh, dey can't, really," said the Baron. "But you know, dey just keep trying anyway.”

“Why is it a girl has to be so silly to catch a husband?”“Ah specs it’s kase gempmums doan know whut dey wants. Dey jes’ knows whut dey thinks dey wants. An’ givin’ dem whut dey thinksdey wants saves a pile of mizry an’ bein’ a ole maid. An’ dey thinks dey wants mousy lil gals wid bird’s tastes an’ no sense atall. It doan make a gempmum feel lak mahyin’ a lady ef he suspicions she got mo’ sense dan he has.”

“You know how dey say some people “devour” books? Not in da way ME do! Me REALLY devour books!”

“Dose who love deep never grow old... Dey may die of age, but dey die young.”

“For de small stealing dey puts you in jail, soon or late. But for de big stealing dey puts yo' picture in de paper and yo' statue in de Hall of Fame when you croaks! If dey's one thing I learned in ten years, listenin' to de white quality on de Pullman cars, it's dat same fact. And when I gets a chance to use it -- from stowaway to Emperor in two years. Dat's goin' some!”

“Dey's some things I don't got to be told. I kin read them in folks' eyes.”