“Look around you. Watch how people function and interact with one another. You'll see this is going on everywhere all the time. People devour each other in the name of love, or family or country. But that's an excuse; they're just hungry and want to be fed. Read their faces, the newspapers, read what it says on their T-shirts! 'I think you're mistaking me for someone who gives a shit.' 'My parents went to London but all they brought me back was this lousy T-shirt.' 'So many women, so little time.' 'Whoever dies with the most toys, wins.' They're supposed to be funny, witty, and postmodern, Miranda. But the truth is they're only stating a fact: Me. I come first. Get out of my way.”

“I died at Lake Silencio and all my wife got me was this lousy T-shirt.”

“Oh, I brought you something." Her mom pulled a bag from her purse. "I know how you like T-shirts," she said.Kylie couldn't help but think, My mom went to England and all I got was a T-shirt, but she smiled and pulled it out of the bag and then chuckled when she read the script across the front: My mom went to England and all I got was this T-shirt."Perfect," Kylie said.”

“We cannot scale Mt Everest in 20 minutes, but give us two weeks, and we'll be back with T-shirts for everyone that read, "I climbed Mt. Everest and this lousy T-shirt is all I got.”

“I sensed him leaning forward. It's weird to feel someone's attention on you that way, like you're the only thing in the world they're listening to. Most of the time people are distracted, or just thinking about what they're going to say next.”

“He said to me once that most of the time people use the word love as just another way to show off they're hungry. The way he said it went something like: Glorify their appetites.”