“Conrad”
“And after, when it was bedtime, I would sing, “We love you, Conrad, oh yes we do. We love you, Conrad, and we’ll be true” into the bathroom mirror with a mouthful of toothpaste. I would sing my eight-nine-ten-year-old heart out. But I wasn’t singing to Conrad Birdie. I was singing to my Conrad. Conrad Beck Fisher, the boy of my preteen dreams.”
“...And call me Conrad!”
“Is it so impossible that Conrad Fisher would like me?”
“James (like the far more visceral Conrad) seizes your life. ”
“Conrad might be on his way to achieving godhead and wouldn't that be a kick in the ass?”