“That's another thing that pisses me off about that Michelangelo statue of me in Florence. He's got me standing there uncircumcised! Who the fuck did he think I was?”

“You see, I don’t know why I did it,” he declared as if he hadjust discovered the cure for cancer. But the only thing he haddiscovered was yet another way to piss me off.”

“I know you'll tell me to fuck off, but I think Curran loves you. Truly loves you. And I think you love him, Kate. That's rare. Think about it--if he really stood you up, why would he be so pissed off about the whole thing? You both can be assholes of the first order, so don't let the two of you throw it away. If you're going to walk away from it, at least walk away knowing the whole picture.""You're right. Fuck off. I don't need him," I told her.”

“She got pissed when I accused her of having Bieber Fever (it pisses me off that I even know what the fuck that means – I blame that on society)”

“Piss me off again and I'll rip you a new asshole and then fuck it. And that's just the foreplay.”

“He made me care and that pissed me off.”