“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the blame”
“If the second date seems to be going well, it's pretty much a given that by dessert I'll renounce my faith”
“A watched pot never boils.... but it does develop paranoia”
“Does speed dating necessarily end up in a quickie divorce....?”
“When she says 'I've never done this before" she just means with you”
“My Anorexic Ex was so skinny she didn't give head, she gave skull”