“When it comes to exacting revenge, it gets harder and harder to top yourself each successive time”
“Revenge is a dish best served by a tennis racket”
“My recipe for success: Have someone else do it”
“When it comes to relationships, I find it best to have two feet out the door”
“It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the blame”
“I started to enjoy the regal sport of cockfighting... but I'm still having trouble getting the hang of windmilling the bayonet”
“When Unicorns headbutt, there are no winners" ”