“I mean, I knew I wasn't a nice person, but what did I do in my past life to deserve this? I must have hit a bus full of nuns while driving a stolen car on my way to selling drugs to schoolchildren!”

“You took me for a date at the zoo,said my love left something to prove,so I did all I knew to do,I stole a fat rhinoceros for you!Stolen rhino, in my car,Stolen rhino, now love me moreStolen rhino, I did it for you,Stolen rhino, don't make me steal two!”

“I don't hate anyone. but if someone I knew ever got hit by a bus... I'd probably be driving it.”

“Really? If I could hate my trainer? That would be ideal. I'd prefer to despise this person with the fire of ten thousand suns. So when I walk - nay, crawl - out of here at the end of my workouts, I want to lull myself to sleep by picturing my very talented and inspirational trainer getting hit by a bus. A bus that I am driving.”

“While he was doing it, I went over to my window and opened it and packed a snowball with my bare hands. The snow was very good for packing. I didn’t throw it at anything, though. I started to throw it. At a car that was parked across the street. But I changed my mind. The car looked so nice and white. Then I started to throw it at a hydrant, but that looked too nice and white, too. Finally I didn’t throw it at anything. All I did was close the window and walk around the room with the snowball, packing it harder. A little while later, I still had it with me when I and Brossard and Ackley got on the bus. The bus driver opened the doors and made me throw it out. I wasn’t going to chuck it at anybody, but he wouldn’t believe me. People never believe you.”

“I would... learn how to drive... have a nice car... and drive it.”