“Now I know what a piece of bacon feels like when it is suddenly picked out of the pan on a fork and put back on the shelf!""No you don't!" he heard Dori answering, "because the bacon knows that it will get back in the pan sooner or later; and it is to be hoped we shan't. Also eagles aren't forks!”

“Look. Survey. Inspect. My hair is ruined! I look like a pan of bacon and eggs!”

“Listen to this, okay? Just listen. You hear that? That's market bacon hitting the pan. Today a child is born unto us, and his name will be bacon.”

“When I'm with him, I can feel myself getting better. It's like he's picking up broken pieces of me and putting me back together, and I don't even know he's doing it. We never talk about it. We don't go to therapy. He just loves me and that's enough.”

“I had a naked incubus in my bedroom. With a frying pan of half-cooked bacon, and a hard-on. And a unicorn bite on his ass. Christ, this was turning out to be a weird morning.”

“Let's be friends based on mutual hate."- Wallace Wells"Listen to this, okay? Just listen. You hear that? That's' market bacon hitting the pan. Today a child is born unto us, and his name will be bacon." - Wallace Wells”