“I think I'll move to Australia.”

“Some days are like that. Even in Australia.”

“I didn't really notice that he had a funny nose.And he certainly looked better all dressed up in fancy clothes.He's not nearly as attractive as he seemed the other night.So I think I'll just pretend that this glass slipper feels too tight.”

“I went to sleep with gum in my mouth and now there's gum in my hair and when I got out of bed this morning I tripped on the skateboard and by mistake I dropped my sweater in the sink while the water was running and I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.”

“I had it together on Sunday.By Monday at noon it had cracked.On Tuesday debrisWas descending on me.And by Wednesday no part was intact.On Thursday I picked up some pieces.On Friday I picked up the rest.By Saturday, late,It was almost set straight.And on Sunday the world was impressedWith how well I had got it together.”

“It is true love because when he is late for dinner and I know he must be either having an affair or lying dead in the middle of the street, I always hope he’s dead.”

“If his mother was drowning and I was drowning and he had to choose one of us to save, He says he'd save me.”