“And I was right to be...to become a cutter, because maybe you think this doesn't look so bad, that girls cry, that people cry, but you'd be wrong, you'd be so wrong, anything...anything at all...would feel better than this does. I'm...sorry." She tries to catch her breath. "I'm sorry to be putting you through this...""Willow, you haven't put me through anything.”

“The truth is I feel bad about calling you a whore. I don't know anything about your personal life; my judgment was based on nothing more than a general whorish vibe you give off.You look like you'd screw any squirrel that came your way. You look like you'd even screw the knothole in that tree where you live. But this is all speculation on my part, based on nothing more than your aforementioned whorish vibe and sleazy demeanor. Maybe I'm wrong about you. If so, I apologize.But I really don't think I am.”

“I'm not sure if you even want me around or if you just feel sorry for me. I'm not sure of anything.”

“Wisdom you speak, Obi Tina.''None of that - I'm the one who gets to speak backwards - no, we're both wrong - that's the little green guy, Yoda.''You're right. So I just get to pout and act badly when you try and teach me anything.''Try channelling Luke rather than Annakin - the outcome is better.”

“All this, all of this love we're talking about, it would just be a memory. Maybe not even a memory. Am I wrong? Am I way off base? Because I want you to set me straight if you think I'm wrong. I want to know. I mean, I don't know anything, and I'm the first one to admit it.”

“There should be a phone service that turns off your phone between midnight and six A.M. every night. And if you want to make a call, you have to pick up the phone and talk to an operator: Put me through to AAA. My car battery's dead. Yes, ma'am. Put me through to Pink Dot. I need vanilla Häagen-Dazs toute de suite! Yes, ma'am. Put me through to my ex-boyfriend... I'm sorry, ma'am, the operator would say. That would be a bad idea. Now you go to bed before you do anything stupid.”