“It has oft been said that physicians make the worst patients, but it is the opinion of This Author that any man makes a terrible patient. One might say it takes patience to be a patient, and heaven knows, the males of our species lack an abundance of patience.”

“Reformed rakes make the best husbands,"Violet said. "Rubbish and you know it."-Anthony to Violet”

“...there us a difference you know, between the male and the female ghost-""What is the difference?" Georgina asked."Oh, the male ghost is obsessed with venegemce, I find." Lear said, drinking again."And what are females obsessed by?" Hugh asked."Prick songs," Lear said. "Snogging. Same as when they are alive, really.”

“Oh, Daniel,” his mother exclaimed, catching him before he could make his escape, “do come join us. We’re trying to decide if Honoria should be married in lavender-blue or blue-lavender.”He opened his mouth to ask the difference, then decided against it. “Blue-lavender,” he said firmly, not having a clue as to what he was talking about.“Do you think so?” his mother responded, frowning. “I really think lavender-blue would be better.”The obvious question would have been why she’d asked his opinion in the first place, but once again, he decided that the wise man did not make such queries.”

“what a sad pair we are," she said. "Surely we can manage a conversation on a topic other than our respective terrible evenings.”

“Why don’t you purchase an Italian dictionary? I will assume the expense.”“I have one,” she said, “but I don’t think it’s very good. Half the words are missing.”“Half?”“Well, some,” she amended. “But truly, that’s not the problem.”He blinked, waiting for her to continue.She did. Of course. “I don’t think Italian is the author’s native tongue,” she said.“The author of the dictionary?” he queried.“Yes. It’s not terribly idiomatic.”

“I'm leaving!" she said, with, in her opinion, great drama and resolve.But he just answered her with a sly half smile, and said, "I'm following."And the bloody man remained two strides behind her the entire way home.”