“Did you need something?' I asked.'Yes,' he said, reaching out and taking my hand. My heart thumped hard at his touch. I told myself I should pull my hand away, but I couldn't make myself do it.'What did you need?' My voice was little more than a whisper.'Your smile. I haven't seen it all day.”
“Faith," said Jem. "That you were better than you thought you were. Forgiveness, that you need not always punish yourself. I always loved you, Will. Whatever you did. And now I need you to do for me what I connot do for myself. For you to be my eyes when I do not have them. For you to be my hands when I cannot use my own. For you to be my heart when mine is done with beating.”
“Hello,' he said, his voice and smile pleasant.'You can't touch me!' I sat up and pulled the covers over myself.'Yes about that. You need to negate the command.''Excuse me?'He looked at me patiently, like he was explaining something to a stubborn child. 'You need to break that command.''And why on earth would I ever want to do that?' I glared at him. Lunatic.'Because I wasn't finished.''Oh, no, I really think that you were.' I held up my wrist. It still bore the scarlet mark of his hand and, to my eyes at least, was bright against the light of the lamp. Then, since I was holding up my hand anyway, I flipped him off.'You're going to need more.''Well, that's easy.' I held up my other hand and flipped him off with that one, too.”
“I pull away, you pull me back, you grab my hand and wrap me around. What you did not know is—– my heart is my hand.”
“Ara. Ara, stop.” He propped my body against the wall and unfastened my hands from his neck.“Why? What's wrong?” I wiped my mouth dry with the back of my wrist. “Did I hurt you?”“Yes, you little leech.” He cupped his hand over the bite mark and pulled it away to look at it. “I may not have a heartbeat, but I still feel pain.”“You're bruising.” I squinted through the dull light to see his neck.“I know. I can feel that.”“I'm sorry.”“Are you kidding me?” He looked up at me. “Ara, that felt amazing. It hurt, but damn it was hard for me to control myself.”“Control yourself?”“Yeah. I wanted to...” He looked down and shook his head.“You wanted to what?” I lifted his face.“I wanted to do...things to you.”“What kinds of...things.” Excitement and fear made my heart thump. “Bad things?”“Yes. Bad things.” He reached up slowly and slipped the shoestring strap of my dress down my shoulder, then ran a delicate line of kisses along the curve of my neck, making the skin on my lower back tingle.“That doesn't feel like bad things.”“This is not what I had in mind,” he said into my shoulder.”
“Will,” Jem said. “For all these years I have tried to give you what you could not give yourself.”Will’s hands tightened on Jem’s, which were as thin as a bundle of twigs. “And what is that?”“Faith,” said Jem. “That you were better than you thought you were. Forgiveness, that you need not always punish yourself. I always loved you, Will, whatever you did. And now I need you to do for me what I cannot do for myself. For you to be my eyes when I do not have them. For you to be my hands when I cannot use my own. For you to be my heart when mine is done with beating.”