“I had to be different... so I would not be inferior. We could not occupy the same space together. Like horses in a race, I was tired of jostling for position and losing. I chose a different course so that losing would not be an option.”

“How different would I be, if I'd never met him? Might I have had a normal dating life like my friends did, flitting from one guy to the next, never getting too serious or too invested in one while I was still so young? Who would I be if I hadn't endured the heartbreak of losing him & losing that part of myself that was built around him?”

“A time, a space, a different place/ How perfect we might be/ I would be the wind that blows/ You’d be that Willow tree/ And I could never bare the thought of you not by my side/ So I would be the warmth of day/ You’d be the cool of night”

“Maybe, if I were very, very, very lucky, I would somehow be able to save Edward. But I wasn't so stupid as to think that saving him would mean that I could stay with him. I was no different, no more special than I'd been before. There would be no new reason for him to want me now. Seeing him and losing him again . . .I fought back against the pain. This was the price I had to pay to save his life. I would pay it.”

“We have amazing sex, but I think it's more than the air of mystery that makes it so incredible. If we dated, that would be gone and when we broke up, I wouldn't have that option anymore. I don't want to lose it, it's important. It makes me feel powerful.”

“That day I carried the dream around like a full glass of water, moving gracefully so I would not lose any of it.”