“One of the few times I’ve ever wished for a penis,” she said to Rae when the bartender stepped up to take the order of yet another male customer. They’d been waiting to be served for over twenty minutes. She’d even worn the red magic boob dress tonight, but unfortunately, its mojo offered no help in this particular situation.“You haven’t had sex in six months,” Rae said. “If I were you, I’d be wishing for penises every night.”

“Once again, Rylann tried to catch the eye of the female bartender working Firelight’s main bar.“One of the few times I’ve ever wished for a penis,”

“Unfortunately, she did. “Do you think any of us will ever be normal again?”Rae considered this. “I’m told that somewhere around third year, we lose the urge to cite the Constitution in everyday conversation.”

“Please. Like a little hangover’s going to get in the way of a man in love.”“Aw. That’s very romantic,” Rylann said.“Plus, I haven’t gotten laid in two months, and the reunion sex is awesome.”“And there’s the Shane we know and love.”

“I’m not sure I trust myself around you I liked you from the start, J.D. I really wish things had been different, that's all.”

“He gripped her shoulders determinedly. 'I should’ve told you this earlier, Jordan. Now that I’ve got my chance, you’re going to hear it whether you like it or not. You came into my life and messed the whole thing up and now I’m screwed. Because I’m in love with you. As in balls-out, head-over-heels, watching-Dancing-with-the-Stars-on-Monday-nights, wine-and-bubble-bath kind of love. Hell, I think I’d even wear a scarf indoors for you.”

“Well, Ma, see... there's this girl."Silence.He checked to make sure the call hadn't been dropped. "You still there, Ma?"A sniffle."You can't be crying already," he said. "I haven't told you anything about her yet.""It doesn't matter, Nick," his mother said through her tears. "Those are the three words I've been waiting thirty-four years to hear.”