“You gotta be kidding me!" I clench my fists. "I am NOT Bilfro Baggins. You are not a wizard with a pointy hat, and this is not the one ring of power." I raise my finger toward the jagged stone.Jeff's brows rise. "Bilbo? Bilbo Baggins?""Whatever!”

“ "Even with your face in such a state, I can see you are quite lovely. I'j used to certain...standards. You will look good traveling on my arem, as part of my entourage."His words make me want to hurl."You may find I am not the monster you imagine.""Oh, no, " I say. "I bet you're a real prince.""King, actually," he says with a slow grin." ”

“What am I without him? My heart is burnt out, void, like the cold remnant left after a supernova.”

“I forget my own name when he smiles like that.”

“We're going to die. We're going to die...""We're not going to die," he barks. "Do YOU want to drive?"My head shakes violently. "No way.""Then stop...side seat driving!”

“This Jacob dude sounds like a real Bilbo Douche-Baggins.”

“I am like a burglar that can't get away, but must go on miserably burgling the same house day after day.—Bilbo Baggins”