“I HEARD YOU LIKE TO DO IT WITH THE LIGHTS ON. BUT I REALLY MAKE BABIES WHEN THE MIC'S ON. ”

“My mother said she already knew how I was. She could tell I was like that since I was a baby. She told me a story about when I was a toddler. She said that one day, she heard an alarm clock ringing in her room and when she went inside, she saw me bent over it. When she got closer, she could she me shaking baby powder on it!“What are you doing, Joey?” She asked me.“Baby crying,” was my reply.”

“How can I have my 15 minutes of fame when open mics only allow you to perform for 10 minutes.”

“I was thinking about attraction. I have this theory on it. On love." She wouldn't look at me.I swallowed, but managed, "This ought to be good."Nuala shot me a hard look. "Shut up. I don't think love has anything to do with how the other person is. I mean, maybe a little. I think what really matters is you yourself. Like, you know, let's say you lo- really liked a self-involved ass. That doesn't matter. What matters is how that ass makes you feel. If you feel like the best person in the world when you're with him, that's what makes you like him. It really isn't about how nice a person he is at all."I ran my tongue over my bottom lip. "I like it. It's like the selfish person's guide to love. It's not you, baby, it's me I'm in love with.”

“Why do you think they don’t like me? They hired me for God’s sake. It’s not like there was any mystery about my history.”“I heard you used iambic pentameter once when you should have used a catalexis.”“Huh?”“Believe me, whatever the reason is, it will make as much sense.”Swift thought this over. Max was probably right, but it was still a weird, unhappy feeling. His mouth curved. “Do you really know what catalexis is?”“Not a clue. I heard you mention it once. It stuck in my memory because it sounds like a cross between a Cadillac and a Lexus.”

“Haven, baby, I need you to wake up. You have to make it. I can't do this if you don't.”