“Oh we both have screws loose. Just fucking look at us, Dex! We're in the mountains trying to find Sasquatch and we're arguing over the llama formerly known as Twatwaffle.”

“I feel kind of bad for calling him Twatwaffle now.”“You should feel bad,” I yelled. “For all we know, Twatwaffle saved our lives and maybe Mitch did too. There’s obviously something out here. Who the fuck decapitates a llama?”“I’m sure this particular llama was on many a hit list.”

“I know most people would say we're just kids, or to young too know what love is. But screw that. I've known you my whole entire life. We have shared everything together.”

“Even if we become glowing clouds of ectoplasm, there's going to be something we're competing for - and most of us will feel as though we're getting screwed.”

“We're sistas. We treat each other like sistas. That's the blessin'. That's the problem. We come together cause we're both bein' fucked over by the same people. We get close. And then we fall in love with each other cause us third world diva gals are beautiful and blessed like none other.”

“We're [parents]) always bluffing, pretending we know best, when most of the time we're just praying we won't screw up too badly.”