“My language is the common prostitute that I turn into a virgin.”

“Heinrich Heine so loosened the corsets of the German language that today every little salesman can fondle her breasts.”

“I had a terrible vision: I saw an encyclopedia walk up to a polymath and open him up.”

“I have to do this, as long as it is at all possible; for if those who are obliged to look after commas had always made sure they were in the right place, then Shanghai would not be burning.”

“Quien calla una palabra es su dueño; quien la pronuncia es su esclavo.”

“Intercourse with a woman is sometimes a satisfactory substitute for masturbation. But it takes a lot of imagination to make it work.”

“In Berlin, things are serious but not hopeless. In Vienna, they are hopeless but not serious.”