“Satire that the censor understands is rightly censored.”

“I have to do this, as long as it is at all possible; for if those who are obliged to look after commas had always made sure they were in the right place, then Shanghai would not be burning.”

“Quien calla una palabra es su dueño; quien la pronuncia es su esclavo.”

“Intercourse with a woman is sometimes a satisfactory substitute for masturbation. But it takes a lot of imagination to make it work.”

“In Berlin, things are serious but not hopeless. In Vienna, they are hopeless but not serious.”

“Ma dove troverò mai il tempo per non leggere tante cose?”

“My language is the common prostitute that I turn into a virgin.”