“She wore leopard-skin leggings, a tight black turtleneck sweater and sparkly red heels. I don't make this stuff up.”

“I had to say it gave me a warm feeling to picture Meredith Winslow spending twenty years or so in an ill fitting orange jumpsuit, cozying up to a great big girl named Beulah”

“I needed another sibling the way I needed a sixth toe. Or a twelfth toe. You know, an extra one on each foot. Never mind.”

“Men were good for one thing only. Killing spiders. Other than that, I was on my own. It was sad though. Where was the chivalry of yesteryear?”

“If my life were a book, I would have masking tape holding my hinges together. My pages would be loose, my edges tattered and my boards exposed, the front flyleaf torn and the leather mottled and moth-eaten. I'd have to take myself apart and put myself back together, as any good book restoration expert would do.”

“Well, that was embarrassing. There was nothing wrong with talking to the voices in my head--unless everyone else was listening in.”

“So how's the putrid pile of caca doing?”