“What do you want to see?" he asks. What I always want to see. "A place I'll never forget.”
“I love you," she says. "But that doesn't mean I'm ready to give up my life for you. I don't want to pull over and park right now. I want to see places, Gray. I want to live my life. You're asking me to give up who I am. If I move with you, I'll just be living your life. Your dream. I'll regret the things you're going to hold me back from doing, and then I'll probably blame you. And that's not fair to either of us.”
“You see the most when you're not looking for anything in particular...when you look too hard for something, you get nearsighted because you only see what you want to see.”
“I don't want to lose you," he says.I stop because I finally know what I need to say."Gray, I'm not yours to lose.”
“I'm learning it's human nature to want the things you can't have. What changes is how you go about pursuing the things you want. When you're a little kid and you're told no, you scream and throw a temper tantrum. When you're a teenager and your parents tell you no, you're old enough to internalize your temper tantrum. But you're smarter and you're sneakier this time around. So you nod and act like you care when they say no, when they tell you who you can be friends with, when they say they know what's best. But then you go behind their backs to do it anyway. Because at some point, you need to start calling the shots. At some point, you have to start believing that you know what's best. Or...you just stop asking for their permission in the first place.”
“But I'm learning it's human nature to want the things you can't have. What changes is how you go about pursuing the things you want. When you're a little kid and you're told no, you scream and throw a temper tantrum. When you're a teenager and your parents tell you no, you're old enough to internalize your temper tantrum. But you're smarter and you're sneakier this time around. So you nod and act like you care when they say no, when they tell you who you can be friends with, when they say the know what's best. But then you go behind their backs to do it anyway. Because at some point, you need to start calling the shots. At some point, you need to start believing you know whats best. Or, I thought with a smile, you just stop asking for their permission in the first place.”
“It's dying," I say. "When the center is exposed like that, it doesn't have a chance.""But it's beautiful," she points out, I stare at the shriveling cactus and try to see the beauty in it."That's the way I want to go out," she decides."What?" I ask. "Torn up and ripped open?"She shakes her head. "Totally exposed, with no regrets. You can tell this cactus lived; it has the battle scars to prove it. Why go out looking perfect and put together? It means you didn't experience anything. You didn't take any risks.”