“Why are you taking your breasts away?”-Dane “Cernunnos” Hearne”

“I have sieged many a castle in my day, m'lady, but my attack on your keep will be the sweetest of all."She giggled as I kissed every inch of her face. "Oh, we're doing medieval now? Okay, I can do that. I've been to a Renaissance Faire. Avast ye varlet! No quarter!""That was piratical, dearling, but we'll go with it if you like. Lower your gangplanks and prepare to be boarded!"-Dane and Megan (Stag Party)”

“You are too arrogant for your own good. I officially de-mate you. Go away. I never want to see you again. Except maybe tonight. Naked. Your place. But after that, no more.”

“Carrie Fay always says that nothing is really horrible unless it eats away your face.”

“Why aren't you at your booth?" "She ran out of bats' testicles and hares' anuses," I piped up."Is it anuses or ani?" Roxy asked in an aside, looking perplexed. "You say octopi, don't you? Shouldn't more than one hare's anus be ani?”

“I love you, Brynna. I will love you until the day I breathe my last. You belong to me, and I will make you the happiest of women. Now take off all your clothes, and pretend you are a Celtic princess about to be marauded by an incredibly virile Viking studmuffin."-Alrik to Brynna”

“Oooh, dinner and a show! How come you never take us to dinner and a show?"He smiled at Roxy. "I would spend the entire evening fending off the hordes of your admirers."She fanned herself and grinned back at him. "You gotta love all that suave debonairness!”