“Paul begged for it harder.Danny gave it to him.”

“It is tragic for our God, Who gave us His Son to die on the cross, to beg us to love Him.”

“In every possible instance Saint Paul begged Christians to restrain themselves to contain their carnal yearnings to live solitary and sexless lives on earth as it is in heaven. "But if they cannot contain " Paul finally conceded then "let them marry for it is better to marry than to burn." Which is perhaps the most begrudging endorsement of matrimony in human history.”

“[T]hey gave thanks that they were permitted to see so much, and begged for forgiveness for their desire to see more.”

“The archangel Michael came down from on high and I asked him,'Lo, how can I getteth the stick from my friend Paul's ass?' and he said, 'This ought to go a long way.' And he gave me a six-pack of Heineken.”

“The Christians gave Him Sunday, the Jews gave Him Saturday, and the Muslims gave Him Friday. God has a three-day weekend.”