“Come on,” he said, and then dragged me toward the house.I stopped when we got to the porch. “What is that smell?”Ryan sniffed his shirt and with a smile said, “Armani. You like it?”“Not you,” I said. “It smells like someone is frying up dog vomit in your house.” This took Ryan by surprise. I guess it was pretty random. “You’rereally sick sometimes, Baker,” Ryan said. “You know that?”

“Forget Ryan,' Heidi said dismissively. 'He's a tool.''I thought you liked him!''I did--until I saw how little convincing he needed from me to cheat on you. And then I realized, Ryan Dano is a tool.”

“When I got to school the next morning I had stepped onlyone foot in the quad when he spotted me and nearly tackled me to the ground. “Jamie!” he hollered, rushing across the lawn without caring the leastbit about the scene he was creating.The next thing I knew, my feet were off the ground and I was squished so tightly in Ryan’s arms that I could barely breathe.“Okay, Ryan?” I coughed in a hushed tone. “This is exactly the kind of thing that can get you killed.”“I don’t care, I’m not letting go. Don’t ever disappear like that again!” he scolded, but his voice was more relieved than angry. “It’s been days! Youhad your mother worried sick!”“My mother?” I questioned sarcastically.Ryan laughed as he finally set me back on my feet. “Okay, fine, me too.” He still wouldn’t let go of me, though. He was gripping my arms while helooked at me with those eyes, and that smile… You know, being all Ryan-ish. And then, when I got lost in the moment, he totally took advantage ofhow whipped I was and he kissed me. The jerk. He just pulled my face to his right then and there, in the middle of a crowded quad full of students,where I could have accidentally unleashed an electrical storm at any moment. And okay, maybe I liked it, and maybe I even needed it, but still! Youcan’t just go kissing Jamie Baker whenever you want, even if you are Ryan Miller!“Ryan!” I yelled as soon as I was able to pull away from him—which admittedly took a minute.“I’m sorry.” Ryan laughed with this big dopey grin on his face and then kissed me some more.I had to push him away from me. “Don’t be sorry, just stop!” I realized I was screaming at him when I felt a hundred different pairs of eyes on me. Itried to ignore the audience that Ryan seemed oblivious to and dropped the audio a few decibels. “I wasn’t kidding when I said this has to stop.Look, I will be your friend. I want to be your friend. But that’s it.We can’t be anything more. It’ll never work.”Ryan watched me for a minute and then whispered, “Don’t do that.” I was shocked to hear the sudden emotion in his voice. “Don’t give up.”It was hopeless.“Fine!” I snapped. “I’ll be your stupid girlfriend!”Big shocker, me giving Ryan his way, I know. But let’s face it—it’s just what I do best. I had to at least act a little tough, though. “But!” I said in theharshest voice I was capable of. “You can’t ever touch me unless I say. No more tackling me, and especially no more surprise kissing.” He actuallylaughed at my request. “No promises.”Stupid, cocky boyfriend.“You’re crazy. You know that, right?”Ryan got this big cheesy smile on his face and said, “Crazy about you.”“Ugh,” I groaned. “Would you be serious for a minute? Why do you insist on putting your life in danger?”“Because I like you.”His stupid grin was infectious. I wanted to be angry, but how could I with him looking at me like that?“I’m not worth it, you know,” I said stubbornly. “I have issues. I’m unstable.”“You’re cute when you’re unstable,” Ryan said, “and I like your issues.” The stupid boy was straight-up giddy now. But he was so cute that I crackeda smile despite myself. “You really are crazy,” I muttered.”

“I’ll bet Ryan Lilly drinks coffee like a flower—a lily. I drink coffee more like two roses and a nose walk into a bar. I would tell you what the bartender said, but to be honest, the bar was pretty noisy and I didn’t hear what he said.”

“I wasn't afraid of you!' Ryan protested. 'I was half intimidated, half infatuated, and I didn't know how to act because of it.'Sin made a face at Ryan and picked up his chips again. 'How could you be infatuated with me when you didn't even know me?'Ryan scoffed and pointed his cheese-covered fork at Sin. 'You're gorgeous and tragic—gay boys like that kind of thing.”

“Don't get me started on the whole Doctor-Amy-Rory thing. It's kind of like... I dunno. Suppose you'd always fancied Ryan Reynolds. That's fine, yeah. You meet someone else, who is maybe not Ryan Reynolds, but perhaps he's got the same goofy smile. And you think, 'Yeah, that's it, I'm happy.' Then Ryan Reynolds himself roars up in a camper van and says 'Hey guys! Let's all go on a road trip. Bring the boyfriend! It'll be fun.' Only Ryan Reynolds doesn't save the universe. Well, not at weekends.So I guess that's my life. Crammed in a camper van, sneaking the odd glance at Ryan, squeezing the hand of my lovely husband...”