“But he’s a vampire.” — HeatherFidelia shrugged. “Nobody’s perfect. My second husband—he had six toes on one foot.”“This is a little more serious than that. Jean-Luc is literally dead half the time.”Fidelia nodded. “For most men, that would be an improvement.”

“Jean-Luc glanced at the coach. "Who is that man? What is that machine?""It's a dunking booth.""Ah, I understand." Jean-Luc nodded. "If he dose not drown, then he is a witch""No, he's just a creep. It's a game.”

“Well, make up your mind. I don’t have all night.” Fidelia set her beer on the porch and removed a set of keys from her skirt pocket. She fumbled with the key, trying to release the trigger lock on her pistol.“Don’t do that,” Heather warned her. “You’ve had too much to drink.”Fidelia snorted. “I’m not drunk. I’m in complete control.” She tore off the trigger lock.Bang! The gun fired, ripping into a nearby oak tree.The women screamed. Jean-Luc winced.A squirrel plummeted from the tree and landed in the yard with a thud.Fidelia shrugged. “I meant to do that. Damned rodent’s been gnawing on the house. And stealing all the nuts from our pecan tree.”Heather planted her hands on her hips. “Haven’t I told you a million times to keep the locks on?”Fidelia hung her head, looking properly remorseful. “I’ll be more careful.” She switched on the safety, then shot Jean-Luc a pointed look. “I know how to deal with a scumbag with nuts.”

“He assaulted the man with a psychic wave. "You are a cockroach." In his inebraited state, Cody had no resistance at all to a vampire mind control. He fell to the floor and scurried around the foyer on all fours. "I am a cockroach" he muttered in a squeaky voice. "Hmm, about time you figured that one out," Fidelia steped back as he brushed against her long skirt.”

“This is not a good time, Miss Implant." Roman felt Jean-Luc jabbing him in the back with his walking stick. "Uh, Porky. No, I mean--" Damn, what the hell was her name?”

“I can’t date a man who has survived for centuries by biting women and sucking their blood.” — Heather“I bet he gives one hell of a hickey.” — Fidelia”

“Digger motioned to Zoltan. “What about that one? He has funny eyes. Could be an alien.”“He’s Zoltan, a vampire like me,” Phineas explained.“Are you sure? Zoltan sounds like an alien planet.”