“This guy is an epic douche. Kick his shiny ass, Atticus, Oberon said.I compartmentalized his comment and resolved to enjoy it later. I glared at this would be usurper and said in my most authoritative voice, "Aenghus Og, you have broken Druidic law by killing the land around us and opening a gate to hell, unleashing demons on this plane. I judge you guilty and sentence you to death."Amen, Atticus! Testify!”

“Oberon "Holy revelations Druidman! She's on to us!" Atticus "Gods below, I think you're right! Quick, to the Geekmobile!”

“Oberon Atticus "Gods below, I think you're right. Quick, to the Geekmobile!”

“Atticus "three kinds of cat shit, Oberon."Oberon "and an arrogant family of squirrels.”

“Atticus "What's this religion going to be called?" Oberon "Poochism"A:"and the name of this holy writ I will be typing for you?"O:"The dead flea scrolls: A Sirius Prophecy.”

“Oh. Oberon looked at me. I know that has to make you sad. But call to me instead, Atticus. I'll always answer. Your fly has been open all this time, by the way, and Granuaile hasn't said a thing.Thanks, buddy, I said silently as I tried to surreptitiously zip up my jeans.See? I got your back AND your front. I deserve a treat.”

“Granuaile:"So why don't cult leaders achieve godhood?"Atticus:" Because they're megalomaniacs drenched in douche juice.”