“Because even though you're dating five other women, I think I'm cheating on you.”

“Love is by definition an unmerited gift; being loved without meriting it is the very proof of real love. If a woman tells me: I love you because you're intelligent, because you're decent, because you buy me gifts, because you don't chase women, because you do the dishes, then I'm disappointed; such love seems a rather self-interested business. How much finer it is to hear: I'm crazy about you even though you're neither intelligent nor decent, even though you're a liar, an egotist, a bastard.”

“I thought you wanted to date other women?""I didn't want to date other women. We decided in the heat of the moment that were no longer exclusively attached.""And I could date other men."Morelli was starting to look annoyed. "Have you been dating other men?""Maybe.""As long as it isn't Ranger," Morelli said. "I don't think Ranger dates.”

“He came in and took a piss in my hotel bathroom without even closing the door as I'm standing right there. I'm like, "Alright. You're comfortable." It was like we knew each other for four or five years, even though we had never met.”

“I don't need you to tell me I'm not well, though I don't really know what's wrong with me; I think I'm five times healthier than you are.”

“8. Fact: It is a bad idea to date a known cheater, because even if he doesn't cheat on you, you will always know he's capable of it and will never fully trust him. Then you will become even more insecure and neurotic than you already are.”