“Bleeping faeries," I muttered darkly. Why couldn't they leave me alone?Uber-vamp's eyes lit up. "Faeries? Do you know where I can find one?"I rolled my eyes. "Trust me,if I could, I'd set you loose on the whole race.”

“I said home." He laughed again. "You didn't say whose." Furious and too tired to deal with any more faerie crap, I opened my mouth to tell him exactly where to take me and where he could go after that. I wasn't sure a faerie could obey a command to go to hell, but I was going to find out.”

“The whole thing reeked of faerie mischief."Screw you. Me and my magic hands will be fine, thank you very much.I'm staying right where I am.”

“Bleep stupid bleep bleep faeries and their bleep bleep bleep obsessions. He had better stop bleep bleep bleep the bleep bleep rules or I will bleep bleep bleep the little bleeeeeeep.” All in a completely robotic monotone.”

“Where are you going?" I asked,feeling guilty for not being able to hang out with him."To find a faerie to kill me,of course." He winked at us,then pretended to fall straight through when the faerie door opened. Even Arianna laughed as the door closed behind him."Where did you find that one?""I have no idea.I'm a magnet for crazies, I guess.""They must be able to sense a kindred spirit.""You're one to talk.Don't you have more hordes of the undead to lead in a glorious revolution?”

“Lish tried to swear--which is always funny, because the computer won't translate it. It went something like this: "Bleep stupid bleep bleep faeries and their bleep bleep bleep obsessions. He had better stop bleep bleep bleep the bleep bleep rules or I will bleep bleep bleep the little bleeeeeeeeeeep.”

“Where are you going?" I asked, feeling guilty for not being able to hang out with him."To find a faerie to kill me, of course." He winked at us, then pretended to fall straight through when the faerie door opened. Even Arianna laughed as the door closed behind him.”