“I hate the vamp jobs. They think they're so suave. It's not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want to be all sexy, too. And trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy.”

“I sighed. I hate the vamp jobs. They think they're so suave. It's not enough for them to slaughter and eat you like a zombie would. No, they want it to be all sexy, too. And, trust me: vampires? Not. Sexy. I mean, sure, their glamours can be pretty hot, but the dry-as-bone corpse bodies shimmering underneath? Nothing attractive there.”

“What, no flirting?” I asked, trying to buy time. “Aren’t you going to at least try to be sexy? Think of all those vampire fans out there—they’d be so disappointed.” I pulled out my silver knife. Probably should have paid more attention during my knife training. “Tell you what. Let me go and I promise not to tell anyone that you aren’t suave.”

“Let's talk about happy things.What should I be for Halloween? I can't decide between a sexy vampire or a sexy fairy.I've got a whole tub of glitter body gel for either costume,if you want to be the one I'm not!"Faeries and vampires were glittery now?Honestly.”

“Freedom was a foot away when they turned back to me. The one who kept speaking, a tall vamp with a handsome curly-haired glamour, shook his head. "Sorry." He bared his fangs in an apologetic grin. "We're glad you aren't what's hunting us, but we're no friends of IPCA. And we're all very, very, thirsty.""What, no flirting?" I asked, trying to buy time. "Aren't you going to at least try to be sexy? Think of all those vampire fans out there--they'd be so disappointed." I pulled out my silver knife. Probably should have paid more attention during my knife training. "Tell you what. Let me go and I promise not to tell anyone that you aren't suave.”

“Maybe I'm weird, but watching Lend drive was sexy.”

“Bleeping faeries," I muttered darkly. Why couldn't they leave me alone?Uber-vamp's eyes lit up. "Faeries? Do you know where I can find one?"I rolled my eyes. "Trust me,if I could, I'd set you loose on the whole race.”